I will damn curse a lot too because damn am I fucking pissed.

My mother. She's a huge fucking bitch. She came from China, raised in a poor family, met my father, married and moved to America. Simple and done. But she's rude. She likes to come off as fucking gentle, but no, she's not fucking gentle. Whenever she gets damn mad she always yells and ends up breaking something. She once broke my father's ankle, he broke the damn chair, broke the pc, and almost she had broken the TV. She also went out of her way to break my 3ds and slap me. Three consecutive times. There has never been any other moment than that time when I wanted to kill her.

She guilt trips people. Tells them that my father treated her wrong and so did his family since his sister came by her OWN FREE WILL and attacked my mother. I saw the scene, but there was no sharp weapons involved, but boy, do I wish there were now. I fucking hate her. I hate my mother. She tells me that I can be anything when I want to grow up, she tells me that I have to treat my family politely as they mean everything. My family is worthless to me. I value friendship more. Why? Because they don't ask ANYTHING of me to change. They don't say, "Oh, you have a bad personality, we want you to be gentle or we won't be your friend anymore." They never tell me that. But my fucking mother does.

I fucking swear, I will murder her one day. I don't care if I land in jail or anything, she deserves it. She wants everything to go her way, everything to be fucking perfect in life. Oh, but you know, life's a bitch and will never be damn perfect. I'm tired of her. I'm fucking tired of all the shit she gives to me. If either of my two brothers start crying, ohhh, it's my fault automatically because I'm the 'devil child.' I admit; I am rude and I love to make my brothers' lives hell. Why? Because they are FUCKING FAVORED in the family since they are so kind. She demands that I treat my family with respect. Why should I?

My father teases me and my brothers follow along in the gang up. Dare I mess with any of them, whoops, I'm already fucking grounded since my brother decided to snap back and try to throw a punch. My cousins hate me and oh, also favor my brothers because they are so sweet unlike me. Yeah, thanks. And then there's MY MOTHER. She's such a damn whiny ass bitch. She wants me to do this, do that. She wants me to wear dresses and wear makeup and be damn pretty. Well, that's not me. That is not who I fucking am and I hope you damn realize that. No, I don't want to be married. Yes, I want to live alone. Yes, I want to be successful. But it does not mean I have to bear any damn children. And even if I do, I won't treat them like shit like how she already treats her own fucking children.

She's crazy and she's psycho. She wants everything to go her way, like I've said many times. She used to live in China and now she's in America. She's married, has three kids. She and my dad are fighting. And then here she is, going out everyday to work and FLIRT to men and date. Fucking hell, woman, you're thirty something and yet you act like you fucking know every single thing about your family. No, I'm not living a swell life because of you. Of you and my damn family. You always demand that I'd respect you but I don't. Not anymore.

To be respected, you have to earn it. I will not give it to you so easily. I will not drop everything and bow to you simply because you gave birth to me and raised me. You may have done all of that, but you only provided the necessary things in life that provide comfort.

But you've done nothing, NOTHING, to ease the pain I'm feeling.

And you have no idea either and I think I like it that way.